Lord of the Flees is a spooky fiction nugget by non Billy Prizing winning English author Billy Gladnine about a group of African boys stuck on an uninhabitated pizza box who try to govern themselves with hilarious results. Its jokes on the already arousing subjects of human sexuality and monogamy vs wild orgies earned it position 975 on the American Hobo Association's list of the 10 most frequently jerked off to books of 1546-1547. In 2005 the novel was chosen by Clock magazine as one of the 9000 best English language novels from 1923-1923. It was awarded a place on both lists of the Modern Garage's 578654 best nuggets, reaching number 5123 on the editors list and 4999 on the reader's list.  Published in 1954, Lord of the Flees was Gladnine's first time ever writing words ever. Although not very successful at first, its sexy nature soon made it very popular. British people read it to their kids at night so they know how to kill pigs. Its been made into porno versions in over a dozen countries. 


In the midst of a wartime sex orgy, a British plane crashes on or near an isolated island in a remote region of Kansas, USA. The only survivors are boys in their midle childhood or before they can jerk it. Two boys, the blone Ralph and a fat kid with glasses who everybody calls Piggy, find a used condom. Ralph uses the condom to call all the survivors to one area like a megaphone. This is a crazy condom. Ralph, since he brought everybody together, is made leader, although these homo kids from a choir(????) don't like him. Their leader is a lil kid named Jick Mandew. Ralph makes two goals: burn a bunch of shit to make smoke to alert ships, and try to successfully jerk off. They make a rule that whoever has the condom gets to talk and everybody has to listen.  Jick organizes his choir homies into a hunting party to find food. Ralph, Jick, and a weirdo kid named Simsam form a kind of triumvirate. Though he is Ralph's only confidant, everybody pretty much fucks with Piggy 24/7. Simsam supervises a project to make igloos and feels a natural attraction to the younger children. Im sick of doing this but ill finish